May 27 – May 29, 2022

Buckle up, because we’ve arrived at arguably one of the best parts of the whole trip: our foray into the wild highlands around Scotland’s Loch Lomond.

We have only good things to say about our pleasantly pedantic journey up to the Loch. Mid-afternoon on Friday, we took a direct tram from Edinburgh City Center to the Edinburgh airport (EDI). This would not be our last time here, but certainly our collective briefest time here. We picked up two snazzy Vauxhall SUVs from Enterprise (snazzy because of the orange one Mark had to drive; Ismael got a more dignified hunter green). Boy howdy, words cannot do the countryside justice. We tried with our phone cameras, but until you’re confronted face to face with the sheer perfection of rolling hills, sheep and cows as far as the eye can see, and little weathered farmhouses, you haven’t lived! And at dawn, when we drove back to EDI a few days later, it was enough to bring a tear to our (Jordan’s) eye. Our drive seemed to be a common one taken by Glasgow and Edinburgh natives for a weekend on the lochs, so we felt properly local at this point.

A quick stop at the Stirling Tesco with seven people, as you might guess, should not be documented, fraught with indecision as ours turned out to be. The most important part is that we got fixins for the weekend, ’nuff said. Vibes were something like this:

A brief comment here on our position: we forgot until arriving just how far north Scotland really is. For reference, it is on the same latitudinal line (56 degrees N) as Newfoundland, Moscow, and Copenhagen. The sky remains light until nine or ten PM every night, with a prolonged twilight that feels very magical. The temperatures stayed in the cool fifties and sixties, and that first night, after a pasta dinner, we strolled on down to the dock connected to our Airbnb property and just stared out at Loch Lomond. But of course, goofiness ensued. And after, some more Wheel of Time :).

---

Ah, Chris. Chris, Chris, Chris. Where to even begin? A few months ago, when we were deciding what to do on Loch Lomond, Jordan found a small organic farm online, Portnellan Farms, run by the son of sheep farmers, with a history going back many generations. This guy, Chris, maintains the farm for his parents today, and has supplemented their income with speedboat tours and water equipment rentals. We signed up for a private speedboat tour of the whole loch, and you best believe, our homie Chris delivered. We rocked up to the farm and wandered right on down to a gravel path leading to the dock, where Chris helped us on board and let us pick our itinerary for the day. Over the course of five hours, he took us from the south end of the loch (see our Airbnb starred) to the north end where the loch trails off into the River Fallach, and back again.

A row of islands marks the beginning of the Scottish Highlands (at the Highland Boundary Fault), and we could see the landscape around us shift from rolling hills into steep cliffs and peaks. He pointed out Ben Lomond, a mountain that attracts mountaineers and hikers every year to scale the summit (also starred). We got a little nervous when the river just… ended, but Chris wasted no time jumping out into a little clearing, tying the boat to a tree, and leading us through a field we thought might mark the beginning of the next Midsommar movie. Never fear! he said, and we soon arrived at the oldest pub, the Drovers Inn, in the loch region. A treat! Haggis burgers, fish and chips, and beer for lunch! We were sated and only a little gassy. On the way back, we stopped at one of the islands to poke around and get another view of the lake.

We found out Chris’ fiancée is from Saint Louis, and met him while studying abroad in Glasgow. This gave Sam and Jordan hope that an ordinary girly from the Lou could bag a cute Scottish farmer, and we were only a little devastated to have to leave the farm at the end of the day.

Cue Wheel of Time. An early drive to EDI airport and flights out to the continent awaited us Sunday.